She Waited
by garrus24601
Summary: Commander Shepard wakes up after the end of ME3 and thinks Traynor is dead


Shepard and Traynor

When Commander Shepard first woke after firing the Crucible she was in pain. A pain on a level no person should have to endure. The entire weight of the Citadel was on her and she felt every single pound. She outstretched her arm and with her final thought she fell into unconsciousness, "Traynor."

"Shepard?" sounded a familiar voice. "Shepard is awake!" The pain surged back. _Where am I?_ White walls with a white bed with white sheets with…a hospital. Damn Jane, you survived. Time to assess the damage. The familiar figure walked back into the room. "Shepard its ok, you're safe, its all over." A sigh of relief, the never ending war, done! Then a quick pang of guilt, dead. All the geth, EDI, and all other advanced synthetic life forms are gone because of me. "..the damage was bad, Shepard." Vision still blurry and all but missing in the left eye. "…have not heard from Normandy, yet." _Samantha?!_

"Normandy?" Shepard managed to croak out. "Don't worry we will find them" replied the voice, the Australian accent only registering now. "Miranda?" said Shepard while looking up. A teary eyed Miranda was looking down on her. "How bad is it? How bad am I? Are they…are they gone?"

"Shepard you deserve to know. Others wanted to take it slow with you, but you can handle this. Whatever you did to the crucible killed the geth. Turned off like they never existed. It has been 4 months since VoR day and they found you. You were stabilized shortly after they found you, but the damage was done. Your implants were renedered useless and there was significant damage. Both your legs were amputated above the knee and your left arm below the elbow. With all the tech down from the war its hard to say when prostetics will be ready, but probably not soon Shepard. And there was extensive scarring. I'm so sorry Shepard. We did what we could."

Shepard choked back tears. She could do this. She was the goddam savior of the galaxy, she could survive without legs. Her thoughts flooded back to the thing she couldn't live without. "Miranda" she started trying to keep her voice level "I need to know the status of the Normandy. Good or bad what is the last news we have?"

A pause, that felt like hours, then "We don't know anything. Many ships were lost in the blast. Nothing is known of the status of the Normandy after they left Earth at the beam." Another pause, this one longer than the last. "If they are alive we will find them and we have no confirmation they are dead, but…Shepard…it…uh…doesn't look good."

That was the last straw. The tears came flooding. Gone. I had saved the galaxy from the Reapers and survived, but for what and at what cost? Miranda hugged her, but the tears flowed long after she left and until she fell asleep.

Two Months

Jane Shepard sat. That was all she could do really. They had been able to craft her a new, functioning arm, but the legs were still gone. She sat. She watched. She waited. It had taken a while to get used to the new face in the mirror. Even with her treatments the disfigurement was significant. She was used to some scars, but burn scars were ugly. They had been confined to the left side of her face and taken her left eye, but that was not why she was in so much pain. The phantom pains in her legs were at times excruciating, but nothing compared to the giant hole in her heart where the Normandy belonged. From her window she could see the spaceport, she could see the rebuilding efforts of the planet. She could see the ships limping in and loved ones being reunited, but not the Normandy. Miranda came by regularly, as well as Jack, Grunt, Wrex, Hackett, and even the new Council but she was no longer essential to the fate of the galaxy. So she sat, withered and waited.

Six Months later

One year. They had dragged her from her hospital room to have medals pinned on and cheer for her on the one year anniversary of VoR day. She had smiled as they gave her every award in the books. She had smiled when they erected a statue in her honor. And she had even smiled when they dedicated the new Citadel to the crew of the Normandy. "The multi-species group that saved the galaxy" was the quote, but Shepard could only feel a pang of loss for her friends. After the 'celebrations' Shepard returned to her lonely room and cried. She should be over this by now. Soldiers die. She knew she had left Kaidian to his death just four years ago. But Samantha wasn't Kaidan. She was the one. Shepard may have saved the galaxy, but Samantha Traynor saved Shepard. And now she was gone.

A few weeks later Shepard left London. She moved to the tropics in a little shack on the beach. Where she could be alone to live out her years. To leave all the reporters and the questions and the constant reminders of memorials all behind. So she sat in her cottage and watched the waves and waited for the day she could join her love.

1.5 years after VoR day

The harbor master sat at his post and twiddled his thumbs. At first the ships straggling in to the docks after the Crucible fired kept him busy from dusk till dawn. Now, though, he mostly just had local traffic. The relays were repaired as of 4 months ago, but most of the traffic was headed out of the relay, not in. That is why when a lone ship broadcasting on Reaper War Alliance channels came in through the relay it got his attention. "SSV Normandy requesting permission to dock" came a voice through the comms. _Is this some sick joke?_ "Sorry sir, could you repeat your clearances these channels are no longer in regular use." _Who the fuck would waltz into this system and try to be the fucking Normandy?_ "Repeat, again this is the SSV Normandy with council Spectre Williams on board. If we can't land get goddam Hackett on the line" came a female voice. _By the gods could it really be them?_ "My apologies Spectre Williams. You are cleared for docking bay 7 at the Normandy Spaceport." A sigh of relief was audible from the other end followed by a poorly covered up sob. _They made it. A year and a half late for the party, but they made it!_ "And ma'am? The Alliance wishes to welcome you home." Before he cut the line the tears were audible.

As the Normandy pulled up to the docks a small crowd had gathered. Mostly reporters, but a growing crowd of observers as well. Most of the crew aboard was ready to be home, or hitch a ride from Earth for the nonhuman crewmembers. But one member in particular was more worried than relieved.

"Traynor? How are you holding up?" Williams asked. "Fine, uh I mean excited to be home ma'am!" Specialist Traynor replied with a salute. "Thank you ma'am for getting us home. We would have fallen apart without you." _Why are you so nervous Traynor. You know she is dead. You almost died in the blast, in a ship, 16 km away. She was right there, she died, just like your parents, just like your colleagues, just like everyone you knew and loved. Welcome home._ "Sam, really how are you. It has to be tough finally getting …that question answered. Are you ok, as a friend?" Traynor looked up and saw the same concern in her friend's eyes. Ash had been there for Traynor the entire time they were stranded. She understood, but now they were actually back on Earth. "Ash" Traynor managed to squeak out. "Do you…" her voice cracked "do you think there is a chance she is alive?" The two embraced in a hug. "I don't know Samantha. I would make a joke how the Skipper wouldn't abandon us or how she is too good to die, but honestly I don't know and I am terrified. What I do know is that in 15 minutes we will have an answer and whether or not that answer is good we have about 7 million questions to answer to about 1500 reporters." Traynor chuckeled and wiped away the tears. "Alright Commander Williams, lets do this."

 _Home._ Commander Ashley Williams breathed in the fine afternoon air as she stepped of the ship. For just one second before she was mobbed by the press she enjoyed the solid ground of the planet. _Her planet, Earth._ Then instantly the questions flew in. Time flew as fast as the reporters until finally Hackett saved her. He ushered the crew into the new Alliance facility named after the Normandy. _Pretty awkward to name something in honor of dead people only to find out they are alive._ As they passed through the Alenko medical ward she realized that the pressing question they needed answered had not even been brought up. _Is Shepard alive?_ They finally stopped in a large conference room in the Williams Memorial Command Center. _I'm just going to pretend it was named after my grandfather. But remember to ask Hackett to get the Memorial out of the name for now._

"I'm sure this has been a hell of a day for you guys, shit its probably been a hell of a two years. So I just want to be the first to say Welcome Home and thank you. Thank you for being the ones to sacrifice your selves, your safety, your time, and your friends." Ash looked at Traynor after the last sentence. She looked ready to collapse. "There are many things you need to know" Hackett continued "but the first and foremost is thank you. I don't want to keep you here long because you need to find your families and friend, but you should also know that Shepard is still alive. We will make sure this news gets to her ASAP. Otherwise, you have done the galaxy a great service and we cannot do enough to thank you."

Traynor collapsed to the ground and cried. _ALIVE!_ Everyone was in shock. They had all cautiously wished against better logic that this would be true, but hearing it for certain was surprising to all. Williams ran up and hugged her. "Samantha shes alive!" she exclaimed with tears in her eyes. Everyone was excited, but most had families to return to so the celebration was short lived. Only when everyone was gone and Traynor was alone did the true understanding sink in. She had been a shell this past year without Shepard. Now she finally had a chance to start a life! Hackett walked in and up to her. "Specialist Traynor." Samantha saluted. "We are aware of your relationship with the Commander and have arranged to have private transport to her beach home in South America. Come with me."

Shepard swore. _Fuck!_ She loved the solitude the beach house afforded her, but the internet connection was sketchy on a good day. "I swear to God if I miss my episode of CSI: Luna I will wheel my ass to the nearest comm post and punch the officer on duty there" she complained to no one in particular. So as usual she sat and she watched and she waited, until she heard the noise of an approaching shuttle. _Fuck another interview. I'll just try to look busy._ Hackett had the key code to get in and occasionally he would check on her, but mostly it was reporters trying to get their big scoop on the Reaper war that bothered her. So she pretended to look out the window until she heard the door slide open. She turned over her left shoulder to greet Hackett.

"Shepard" Traynor whispered. There she was. Not quite the same. Much thinner, but alive. She looked perfect sitting looking out the window, this was a life she could live.

"Samantha?" choked Shepard. "You…you are here?" Shepard involuntarily teared up obscuring her one seeing eye. She moved to wheel around when she heard a gasp from Samantha.

"Oh my god Shepard!?" Samantha only now saw that Shepard was missing both legs and the ugly disfiguring scars to her entire left side.

"That bad huh?" Shepard tried to joke. But the shock of seeing the ghost of the love of her life was too much. She broke down in tears.

Samantha rushed to her side and knelt by her chair. "No Jane, you are wonderful. I just…its been so long….I'm sorry its just that you know…you…I love you." She blurted. She was so happy to have her love back, but she couldn't shake the sight of Shepard's disfigured body.

"Sam I know I look different. And it really has been so long. I thought you were dead and…then you walked through my door only to find me a shell of what I used to be. If you want to go now and remember the old me, the good me, I don't blame you. I love you too, but you deserve to be happy with someone you don't have to take care of."

Samantha listened to her love talk and paused before answering. "Jane Shepard." As she looked into her green eyes, _well eye._ "I have spent a year and a half without you thinking you were dead. I am exactly where I want to be, by your side, and I'm just damn glad that that doesn't mean im standing in a cemetery. I love you, will always love you and nothing that is on this planet will change that, ever."

Shepard choked on her tears "Well I guess we will have to see about getting that picket fence installed."


End file.
